The third phase...

You may have noticed in the caption on this blog I claim to be in the third phase of my life. When I originally wrote that line I had a general impression that this was so but I had not yet thought through the whole notion of what framed each phase; what defined each phase.

I have had considerable time to reflect these past several weeks and now I have a much more clear understanding of the three phases of my life. The first phase ran from my birth in 1950 to my marriage in 1973. In this period I learned the basic skills necessary for life, had some fun then found a mate and settled down.

The second phase is most clearly shaped by my role in helping to raise a family; well two families really. My first is made up of my three children D'Arcy, Evan and Tianna while my second comprises Dylan. The second phase lasted 22 years with my ex-wife Judy and 11 years with my ex-girlfriend Fiona.

Now I am in my third phase and for the first time in over 33 years I am responsible to and for no one. It is a most odd feeling knowing that I have the ability to make so many choices for myself and some resources to help make those choices possible. I can keep going to school. I can travel. I can buy a house. I could look for a job overseas. In other words I can dream and then make my own dreams come true. I don't have to compromise or accommodate or negotiate or mitigate. I simply have to dream and then choose. My wants are modest, which matches my resources but my most important resource is me and I no longer have to share that with anyone unless I choose to.

From change comes opportunity. From pain rebirth and growth.